Billy Laughs


bl3“Guess I’ll be going now. Don’t trouble to see me to the door.”
“It’s no trouble, it’s a pleasure.”

“My cousin hasn’t had his hair cut in twenty years.”
“Hmmmm! He’s eccentric?”
“No, he’s bald.”

bl2“I passed your house yesterday.”
“Thanks I appreciate it.”

“Where were you born?”
“I was born in Chicago but I went to school
in Philadelphia.”
“Did you walk or ride?”

bl5“I gave him a bridge for his violin.”
“What’s the idea?”
“To help him get his music across.”

“I forgot my umbrella this morning.”
“How did you remember you forgot it?”
Well, I missed it when I raised my hand to close it after it stopped raining.”


“Did anyone lost a roll of bills around here with a rubber band around them?”
“Yes, I did.”
“Well, I’ve found the rubber band.”

“Is it true that your husband ate his dinner in silence after your quarrel?”
“No – we had soup.”


“Did you say the new baker was fired?”
“Yes, they caught him bringing home the bread.”

“Other people may have more looks and more money than me, but I have a brain.”
“And it’s the little things that count.”
“Give me some pills.”
“What for?”
“Thirty-five cents.”

bl1“Big Chief Running Water has three sons.”
“What are their names?”
“Hot, Cold and Luke.”

“I flew to Australia and back.”
“Aren’t your arms tired?”

“There’s a five dollar cover charge for this table.”
“But this table has no cover on it!”

“Waiter, bring me some tea.”
“Green or black?”
“It doesn’t matter – I’m color blind.”